"Come! all ye, and learn the secret that hath not yet been revealed." Liber AL-2:2
So growing up in a semi-devout Catholic family means being semi-devout. Which in a Catholic family means Catechism. Most of the rest of you would refer to this as Sunday School.
One of the things that was interesting about our parish, and I think several others do this as well, is that Sunday School is held DURING the Mass which means the kids miss one of the central rituals to the dogma. I never quite understood how they justified that, and even though I'm sure other kids were perfectly oblivious, I couldn't help feeling like I was missing out on something going on at the Church.
The little kids learn about the fluffy good parts of being Catholic and Christian (don't want to scare them too early). The somewhat older kids learn about the fire and brimstone, and parents readily take advantage, as this is about the time that kids start thinking for themselves. Older still, you learn about your obligations as a Catholic and a Christian, and your preordained path including First Communion and Confirmation, as well as the other "degrees".
As a side note, looking back I realize how much Catholicism and even various other Christian groups have taken from old world secret orders. There are paths of progression that very much resemble degrees and rituals in other orders and groups. It's somewhat amusing.
Baptism is the entry ritual of bodily nature into the religion. Catholics don't typically believe in full-body immersion, but prefer a symbolic cleansing and anointing. This typically takes place long before any age of consent, and the expectation is that it confers a certain level of "protection" upon the infant, and it is expected to be done very soon after birth. As such, I don't recall mine, but I've seen pictures.
The next is what is called Holy Communion, or rather the First Communion. During mass, there is a Eucharistic celebration wherein those who are worthy may partake. Part of the process to becoming worthy is to go through your First Communion. This happens around the age of 8. It involves an extra set of Catechism classes to understand the symbology of the ritual. At least in as much as an 8 year old is expected to understand. Typically this is also the time wherein Catholics attend to their first confession as well. Confession as a Catholic concept is where you visit with a priest during a designated time and retell your transgressions and receive absolution for them with the understanding that if you are truly penitent, your sins will be forgiven.
I understand the psychology of confession. There is something very cathartic about releasing the tensions of guilt and frustration over things that we know we've done wrong. While at times it can be intimidating, it also can lift the spirit when you are told you are forgiven, and it can alter your mindset in such a way that you are made aware of the harm you caused, and work some level of penance in effort to fix what you have undone. However, Catholics view the ritual of confession as the sole means to be absolved of sins, and no matter how sorry we are, no matter how much we've prayed, no matter how much reconciliation we've enacted with those we've hurt, and no matter what we do to make things right, it doesn't count without a proper confession.
This brings me to the beginning of what later becomes a recurring point arising time after time after time. That is, if God is so powerful and so omnipotent, why does he need a celibate man in a dress to tell me if he has forgiven me or not? Is God incapable of expressing his own absolutions? Are we to believe that he's too busy to tend to the fallen of his flock? Is he so arrogant as to think that we are not worthy to interact with anyone but his underlings? This idea of needing a go-between seemed silly at best, and political elitest hierarchical bullshit at worst.
Anyways. Back to my First Communion, this I remember a bit. We all get dressed up, we all partake first, and then everybody coos and ahhs over us. That's about it. And thereafter, I'm eligible to follow with my parents in procession to receive Holy Communion assuming I remain worthy by attending confession regularly. And so it begins.
Most of the rest of my school-age experiences were mundane. My family celebrated the usual Catholic holidays and they often included lots of family, and the chaos and resentment that many family gatherings tend to bring. Beyond that, I can't say I had any particular religious experiences, but I did notice a distinct disconnect from what was the religious world of attending Mass on Sundays to the majority and remainder of the week. We would be regularly admonished to live our faith and yet I can't say that we brought it home. I don't remember the experience of noticing anybody that appeared to live their lives differently as a result of their faith. Did that mean they weren't living their faith, or did it mean that living their faith didn't amount to much anyways?
It took me a while, but later in my life, I finally saw a person that was living their faith, and I understood at that moment that people like them are rare.
In the meantime, I got great examples of those that weren't.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
My Fall From Grace: Part 1 - The Beginning
In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Gen-1:1
So as a process of my development over the years, one thing that has been notably defined and re-defined is my acceptance and perception of spirituality. Having grown up in a somewhat devout Roman Catholic family, there were elements of spirituality throughout my life, though on some level, they never gelled with me.
I remember learning to say my prayers before bed. As a child, I understood that the idea was that I was supposed to be talking to God to praise him, rejoice in him, and humbly ask for his forgiveness and his assistance in my day-to-day life. However, as the Catholics we were, my prayers consisted of a rigid set of prayers that supposedly served various purposes, but generally took the personalization out of it. I remember Hail Mary's. Our Father's. There were others, but I don't recall them now. But I do remember a sense of solitude in the ritual. I later learned that it was not uncommon in other religious Christian families to say the evening prayers together as a family. We didn't do much of anything together as a family. But thats a whole other post regarding a whole other topic.
I certainly remember going to church. We went every Sunday for as long as I can remember. And I remember my Dad helping out in one capacity or another.
He grew up in the church, and as a young man, once considered life as a priest. He entered the seminary and studied for some time before he realized it was not to be the lifestyle for him. This didn't change his devotion to the church any. He would often "serve mass", which for those of you not familiar with a Catholic mass is the role where you assist the priest up at the altar. This is commonly done by altar boys and girls, but depending on your community, and their interest, there may not be enough kids to provide for the role, so adults who are trained for the roles are welcome to help out. He would also help out with the ushers both in seating as necessary (our church was almost never full enough at the masses we attended to require help seating) or the passing of the collection baskets. This particular role is one I would later learn and help with, but more about that later.
I didn't have much other familial religious influence. My family was not close to most of the rest of our extended family except for our living grandparents.
My father's mother, much like he, was also a rather devout Catholic. She had also grown up in the church, and had very strong feelings about religion and the role of the church in her life. She, more than my parents, was one to ensure I knew what prayers to say and when, and she, unlike my parents, would pray with me and make efforts to nurture that part of my life. She tended to be strict and unyielding in many ways, and I imagine this speaks a lot as to why her influence, as strong as it was, did not have its intended effect on me.
My mother's mother was quite a different sort. Having come from Mexican descent, she believed, as many do, in this cross-breed form of Christianity that has a Catholic influence along with a pagan-ish influence from the native ancient peoples such as the Mayans and the Aztecs. She did not attend church with any regularity unless it was with our family, and she had not grown up or live with a specific religious sense of being. She did, however, live within the influence of various superstitions and things of that nature. And this influence was something that was prevailent in her ancestory. It was once said that her sister, my great aunt, had the "evil eye" and that strange things happened whenever she was unhappy from the time she was a young child. These stories and experiences were my first taste of spirituality outside of my home, and in this case, alternative spirituality.
Oddly, when I was young, religion was not something that kids talked a lot about. I remember knowing that people did different things, although I don't think I encountered much out of the mainstream Catholic and Protestant sects until much later in life. People went to church, they did their thing, and almost nobody ever talked about it, or it seems thought much about it beyond that. I don't recall the school going out of its way to discourage us. I just don't recall it being something of interest.
So with this hodge podge of experience, my toe-dips into religion were, in my mind, tentative at best. There was always the "face" I put on, however. My father was strict and controlling, and of course that meant that things important to him were, by extension, "important to me".
So my beginnings of religion and spirituality were in large part to satisfy my family. I don't recall any particularly interesting personal experiences. I prayed for things, and my prayers didn't seem to have any particular effect one way or another. Things seemed to happen however things were going to happen. I didn't feel as though my spiritual efforts afforded me anything other than a measure of peace in the family. And given how things would go later, I have mixed feelings about what that peace cost me.
I remember learning to say my prayers before bed. As a child, I understood that the idea was that I was supposed to be talking to God to praise him, rejoice in him, and humbly ask for his forgiveness and his assistance in my day-to-day life. However, as the Catholics we were, my prayers consisted of a rigid set of prayers that supposedly served various purposes, but generally took the personalization out of it. I remember Hail Mary's. Our Father's. There were others, but I don't recall them now. But I do remember a sense of solitude in the ritual. I later learned that it was not uncommon in other religious Christian families to say the evening prayers together as a family. We didn't do much of anything together as a family. But thats a whole other post regarding a whole other topic.
I certainly remember going to church. We went every Sunday for as long as I can remember. And I remember my Dad helping out in one capacity or another.
He grew up in the church, and as a young man, once considered life as a priest. He entered the seminary and studied for some time before he realized it was not to be the lifestyle for him. This didn't change his devotion to the church any. He would often "serve mass", which for those of you not familiar with a Catholic mass is the role where you assist the priest up at the altar. This is commonly done by altar boys and girls, but depending on your community, and their interest, there may not be enough kids to provide for the role, so adults who are trained for the roles are welcome to help out. He would also help out with the ushers both in seating as necessary (our church was almost never full enough at the masses we attended to require help seating) or the passing of the collection baskets. This particular role is one I would later learn and help with, but more about that later.
I didn't have much other familial religious influence. My family was not close to most of the rest of our extended family except for our living grandparents.
My father's mother, much like he, was also a rather devout Catholic. She had also grown up in the church, and had very strong feelings about religion and the role of the church in her life. She, more than my parents, was one to ensure I knew what prayers to say and when, and she, unlike my parents, would pray with me and make efforts to nurture that part of my life. She tended to be strict and unyielding in many ways, and I imagine this speaks a lot as to why her influence, as strong as it was, did not have its intended effect on me.
My mother's mother was quite a different sort. Having come from Mexican descent, she believed, as many do, in this cross-breed form of Christianity that has a Catholic influence along with a pagan-ish influence from the native ancient peoples such as the Mayans and the Aztecs. She did not attend church with any regularity unless it was with our family, and she had not grown up or live with a specific religious sense of being. She did, however, live within the influence of various superstitions and things of that nature. And this influence was something that was prevailent in her ancestory. It was once said that her sister, my great aunt, had the "evil eye" and that strange things happened whenever she was unhappy from the time she was a young child. These stories and experiences were my first taste of spirituality outside of my home, and in this case, alternative spirituality.
Oddly, when I was young, religion was not something that kids talked a lot about. I remember knowing that people did different things, although I don't think I encountered much out of the mainstream Catholic and Protestant sects until much later in life. People went to church, they did their thing, and almost nobody ever talked about it, or it seems thought much about it beyond that. I don't recall the school going out of its way to discourage us. I just don't recall it being something of interest.
So with this hodge podge of experience, my toe-dips into religion were, in my mind, tentative at best. There was always the "face" I put on, however. My father was strict and controlling, and of course that meant that things important to him were, by extension, "important to me".
So my beginnings of religion and spirituality were in large part to satisfy my family. I don't recall any particularly interesting personal experiences. I prayed for things, and my prayers didn't seem to have any particular effect one way or another. Things seemed to happen however things were going to happen. I didn't feel as though my spiritual efforts afforded me anything other than a measure of peace in the family. And given how things would go later, I have mixed feelings about what that peace cost me.
Monday, September 24, 2007
Who moved my cheese?
"A change would do you good" - Sheryl Crow
It could be that I am biased because I work in the technical industry that I have a different view on change than some I know. In my line of work, things change constantly. We're always anticipating the next project, and we're always trying to recover from what happened yesterday. Its a tough thing sometimes. There are rarely breaks, and if there are, they are usually not the kind you want.
That said, change seems to be a tough thing for people. Some people seem to crave stability, consistency, and predictability. And when faced with the inevitable changes that occur in life, they are left wondering their purpose and their focus, and they find themselves wrapped up in the loss of their previous niche.
So what does this mean for will?
If we are unclear of our goals and making unsound judgments about what directions we should be taking, we can be left in a lurch when things shift. The time we spend recovering from or mourning these changes is time we take from our true goals.
So how should we deal with change to better facilitate our will?
Facing Reality
I think the first thing we need to do is accept that change is inevitable. We need to understand that everything around us is subject to alteration and that on some level, we can take nothing for granted. This doesn't mean we need to be paranoid, but I think it is wise for us to speculate if ever so slightly about how things may be affected if our dependencies change.
Examples:
Our Jobs - Particularly for those of you not in the tech industry, you might be comfortable that your position and your work are stable and valuable and that as long as you keep your shoulder to the wheel, you'll at least have your current job for as long as you need it. It's a nice fantasy, and I think that maybe with the economy being what it is, people are realizing that companies will fold or reorganize with no warning. So what do you do? How do you plan for that? What can you be doing ahead of time that will facilitate your ability to retain further employment when the current rug gets pulled out from under you?
Our Family (chosen and otherwise) - None of us like to think about the loss of a loved one, but it happens all the time. No rhyme. No reason. Or sometimes we kinda see it coming. Point is, what happens after they are gone? What aspects of day to day life and business change because of their absence? What can you do ahead of time to help yourself in what will be a moment of sorrow and loss?
How about something as simple as our vehicles? Breakdowns happen. Accidents. Thefts. We have a set way of how we go about commuting and traveling. What happens when our set way is no longer? How do we deal with that? How can we plan to cope with the transition to a different way to move about, and what do we need to do to restore our preferred method?
These are but the tip of the iceberg. And most of us spend a lot of time in denial. If we can pretend these things don't happen, and can delude ourselves into believing that nothing will ever change, then we don't have to face these possibilities. We don't have to overcome these uncertainties. We can rest easy in the comfort of our Will du jour.
So if facing the fact that change does happen whether we like it or not, or whether we facilitate it or not, then the next thought is that we can plan ahead for what we know will happen sooner or later. And in planning ahead, we take some of the stress away from what will already be a stressful time when these changes do finally occur.
It could be that I am biased because I work in the technical industry that I have a different view on change than some I know. In my line of work, things change constantly. We're always anticipating the next project, and we're always trying to recover from what happened yesterday. Its a tough thing sometimes. There are rarely breaks, and if there are, they are usually not the kind you want.
That said, change seems to be a tough thing for people. Some people seem to crave stability, consistency, and predictability. And when faced with the inevitable changes that occur in life, they are left wondering their purpose and their focus, and they find themselves wrapped up in the loss of their previous niche.
So what does this mean for will?
If we are unclear of our goals and making unsound judgments about what directions we should be taking, we can be left in a lurch when things shift. The time we spend recovering from or mourning these changes is time we take from our true goals.
So how should we deal with change to better facilitate our will?
Facing Reality
I think the first thing we need to do is accept that change is inevitable. We need to understand that everything around us is subject to alteration and that on some level, we can take nothing for granted. This doesn't mean we need to be paranoid, but I think it is wise for us to speculate if ever so slightly about how things may be affected if our dependencies change.
Examples:
Our Jobs - Particularly for those of you not in the tech industry, you might be comfortable that your position and your work are stable and valuable and that as long as you keep your shoulder to the wheel, you'll at least have your current job for as long as you need it. It's a nice fantasy, and I think that maybe with the economy being what it is, people are realizing that companies will fold or reorganize with no warning. So what do you do? How do you plan for that? What can you be doing ahead of time that will facilitate your ability to retain further employment when the current rug gets pulled out from under you?
Our Family (chosen and otherwise) - None of us like to think about the loss of a loved one, but it happens all the time. No rhyme. No reason. Or sometimes we kinda see it coming. Point is, what happens after they are gone? What aspects of day to day life and business change because of their absence? What can you do ahead of time to help yourself in what will be a moment of sorrow and loss?
How about something as simple as our vehicles? Breakdowns happen. Accidents. Thefts. We have a set way of how we go about commuting and traveling. What happens when our set way is no longer? How do we deal with that? How can we plan to cope with the transition to a different way to move about, and what do we need to do to restore our preferred method?
These are but the tip of the iceberg. And most of us spend a lot of time in denial. If we can pretend these things don't happen, and can delude ourselves into believing that nothing will ever change, then we don't have to face these possibilities. We don't have to overcome these uncertainties. We can rest easy in the comfort of our Will du jour.
So if facing the fact that change does happen whether we like it or not, or whether we facilitate it or not, then the next thought is that we can plan ahead for what we know will happen sooner or later. And in planning ahead, we take some of the stress away from what will already be a stressful time when these changes do finally occur.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Show me
So anyone that has gotten to know me well enough, and has spent any time at length talking to me knows that one of the things I loathe are people that rant and rave about something in their life where they have complete control over the situation, and rather than exert that control, they'd rather envelope themselves in the problem, and offload it emotionally onto someone else.
It never ceases to amaze me the people that give up their choices in life only to sit on their butts and whine and complain.
To these people, the ones I care enough about, I give them my version of tough love.
If you bring to my mental doorstep your dead rat, you damn well better be prepared to clean up all the piece and buff the linoleum when you're done, because I'm gonna give you the third degree.
I ask them what they've done to solve the problem themselves. I point out the obvious solutions that they've glossed over. And in doing so, I often encounter my other pet peeve. The phrase, "I can't". You might as well tattoo the phrase, "I'm Fucked" on your forehead if you utter "I can't" anywhere near me.
And sure. I suppose people go off expecting some sort of sympathy, or empathy, or some such thing. And maybe I'd be a better person if I went around telling these people that "things will get better", and "it will all be better soon". Maybe. Maybe I'd be like the educators who pass their students even when they clearly have no mastery of the most basic skills, because they don't want to offend their delicate self esteem by holding them accountable to the educational system. Maybe I'll be like the mother who tells her child that the abuse his father inflicts on both of them is something he can learn to ignore and grow past. Maybe I'd be like the White Knight victim who spends all their time and energy trying to solve everybody else's problems while ignoring their own. Maybe I'd be the two-faced person who tells these people what they want to hear. Not because its the right thing. But because its the thing that would please them most and make them the most agreeable to me. Maybe...
I'd rather empower people. I want to see people who think about the fact that they have accountability in their own emotions. That they are ultimately responsible for how they feel and how they act, and that they can exert Will to "make it all better", and not expect or hope that some outside force will do it for them.
This is one of the reasons I can't stand what I affectionately refer to as the Astrologically Asinine. They can always come up with a cute excuse as to why their lives suck or why they are justified in behaving badly. Because clearly, it's not their fault. *eyeroll*
You want to rant at me and expect sympathy? Fine. Come prepared. Tell me about what you've done yourself to resolve the problem. Tell me about the struggles you've had facing your own fears and about the triumphs you've had overcoming things you didn't think you could overcome. Tell me about all you've put into it. Then tell me that you know you're blowing steam, and that you already really know the answer to your problems and own up to the reasons you haven't enacted them yet. Show me that inside you lays someone greater than some idiot who expects the world to revolve around him. Show me that you have genuine interest in resolving your troubles, and not that you're a lazy fuck looking for someone to justify you.
And if you want a hand hold? a hug? a kind word? something of that nature? Ask for it. Specifically. Don't try and bind me in the web of your inadequacy, and expect me to realize that this entire charade is just to get a bit of love and affection from me. Otherwise I'll give you the love I give. And if you can't handle that, don't go bringing your shit to my doorstep.
It never ceases to amaze me the people that give up their choices in life only to sit on their butts and whine and complain.
To these people, the ones I care enough about, I give them my version of tough love.
If you bring to my mental doorstep your dead rat, you damn well better be prepared to clean up all the piece and buff the linoleum when you're done, because I'm gonna give you the third degree.
I ask them what they've done to solve the problem themselves. I point out the obvious solutions that they've glossed over. And in doing so, I often encounter my other pet peeve. The phrase, "I can't". You might as well tattoo the phrase, "I'm Fucked" on your forehead if you utter "I can't" anywhere near me.
And sure. I suppose people go off expecting some sort of sympathy, or empathy, or some such thing. And maybe I'd be a better person if I went around telling these people that "things will get better", and "it will all be better soon". Maybe. Maybe I'd be like the educators who pass their students even when they clearly have no mastery of the most basic skills, because they don't want to offend their delicate self esteem by holding them accountable to the educational system. Maybe I'll be like the mother who tells her child that the abuse his father inflicts on both of them is something he can learn to ignore and grow past. Maybe I'd be like the White Knight victim who spends all their time and energy trying to solve everybody else's problems while ignoring their own. Maybe I'd be the two-faced person who tells these people what they want to hear. Not because its the right thing. But because its the thing that would please them most and make them the most agreeable to me. Maybe...
I'd rather empower people. I want to see people who think about the fact that they have accountability in their own emotions. That they are ultimately responsible for how they feel and how they act, and that they can exert Will to "make it all better", and not expect or hope that some outside force will do it for them.
This is one of the reasons I can't stand what I affectionately refer to as the Astrologically Asinine. They can always come up with a cute excuse as to why their lives suck or why they are justified in behaving badly. Because clearly, it's not their fault. *eyeroll*
You want to rant at me and expect sympathy? Fine. Come prepared. Tell me about what you've done yourself to resolve the problem. Tell me about the struggles you've had facing your own fears and about the triumphs you've had overcoming things you didn't think you could overcome. Tell me about all you've put into it. Then tell me that you know you're blowing steam, and that you already really know the answer to your problems and own up to the reasons you haven't enacted them yet. Show me that inside you lays someone greater than some idiot who expects the world to revolve around him. Show me that you have genuine interest in resolving your troubles, and not that you're a lazy fuck looking for someone to justify you.
And if you want a hand hold? a hug? a kind word? something of that nature? Ask for it. Specifically. Don't try and bind me in the web of your inadequacy, and expect me to realize that this entire charade is just to get a bit of love and affection from me. Otherwise I'll give you the love I give. And if you can't handle that, don't go bringing your shit to my doorstep.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
On habit as a factor of Will
"The law of the harvest is to reap more than you sow. Sow an act, and you reap a habit; sow a habit, and you reap a character; sow a character, and you reap a destiny" -- G. D. Boardman
When most people hear the word habit in reference to behavior, it is not unusual that it is associated with a negative connotation: what people refer to as a BAD habit.
But what is habit?
Merriam-Webster defines this context as: a behavior pattern acquired by frequent repetition or physiologic exposure that shows itself in regularity or increased facility of performance, an acquired mode of behavior that has become nearly or completely involuntary.
So why would there be good and bad habits? And what are good and bad habits?
It seems to me that a habit (however you spin its alignment) is just a repetitious behavior. A pattern, as the definition states. So when we talk about "good" habits, we mean things with positive consequences or ultimately positive returns. Things that bring us joy, or work to make our lives easier, etc. "Bad" habits lead to negative consequences, or otherwise unproductive or unhealthy returns. But good or bad, its a pattern. Habit is a pattern that is generally created by the repetition of an action that produces a momentary psychological or physiological pay-off. It's the cumulative consequence of our repetitive action that prompts us to define it as good or bad. But how we define it doesn't change the basic mechanisms.
So how are habits built?
Typically, there are two means by which habits arrive. Either as a somewhat inadvertent perception of an agreeable payoff to an action, or as a deliberate action derived to an expected result. But both involve that momentary pay-off or result. And again, either of these could result in what could be considered good or bad habits.
So what is the implication of habit with regards to the mind?
The human brain is the most sophisticated pattern recognition computer in existence. There is no other means by which data can be processed as efficiently. From the sounds we hear, to the things we see, to any other means by which we receive information, we infer things constantly as a function of pattern. The brain was built for patterns. It likes patterns. Similar patterns are easy. Things that do not seem to form a pattern are not so easy. Think of how we deal with day to day things. Music is a pattern of sounds. Things we consider good music has rhythm and beat, and musical progression.. all of which are patterns. Patterns we understand. Sounds that do not seem to have any set beat or rhythm are generally not considered musical, or perhaps fall into a fringe perception of music because they have patterns we do not understand. And learning to appreciate various types of music comes from learning to understand the inherent patterns.
So what does that all mean?
It means that the mind loves patterns.. Habits are patterns. So the mind loves habits. And this is the biggest reason why habits are difficult to change once they are set. This goes for good and bad habits.
So how does this pertain to Will?
Habits, in any of their forms can interfere with Will. The mind seeks to find the easiest route through the use of habits, and can sometimes pre-empt our conscious choices. How many times have you intended to make a stop along an oft traveled driving route (say, the route you take to work), during a time when you were not normally traveling to work, and in the course of your driving, you completely forgot to stop? This is habit vs Will in action.
The bulk of this battle isn't what to do with good or bad habits, but learning what our habits are. You can't change or improve what you don't even consciously know about. And even though we may consider things good habits, it's important to recognize that life changes, and the habits may require change as well. This is why it is important to be introspective of your actions. Learn your motivations. Understand what drives your life's habits and use that information not only to mold better habits, but just to continue to be willful about your choices. We are not truly living our Will if we run through life on autopilot. Even if the plane appears to be on a good course.
We must be mindful of our actions. Habits, when used for positive means, are good tools in doing our Will, but it is vital that we guide these habits with our Will and not expect them to live our Will for itself.
When most people hear the word habit in reference to behavior, it is not unusual that it is associated with a negative connotation: what people refer to as a BAD habit.
But what is habit?
Merriam-Webster defines this context as: a behavior pattern acquired by frequent repetition or physiologic exposure that shows itself in regularity or increased facility of performance, an acquired mode of behavior that has become nearly or completely involuntary.
So why would there be good and bad habits? And what are good and bad habits?
It seems to me that a habit (however you spin its alignment) is just a repetitious behavior. A pattern, as the definition states. So when we talk about "good" habits, we mean things with positive consequences or ultimately positive returns. Things that bring us joy, or work to make our lives easier, etc. "Bad" habits lead to negative consequences, or otherwise unproductive or unhealthy returns. But good or bad, its a pattern. Habit is a pattern that is generally created by the repetition of an action that produces a momentary psychological or physiological pay-off. It's the cumulative consequence of our repetitive action that prompts us to define it as good or bad. But how we define it doesn't change the basic mechanisms.
So how are habits built?
Typically, there are two means by which habits arrive. Either as a somewhat inadvertent perception of an agreeable payoff to an action, or as a deliberate action derived to an expected result. But both involve that momentary pay-off or result. And again, either of these could result in what could be considered good or bad habits.
So what is the implication of habit with regards to the mind?
The human brain is the most sophisticated pattern recognition computer in existence. There is no other means by which data can be processed as efficiently. From the sounds we hear, to the things we see, to any other means by which we receive information, we infer things constantly as a function of pattern. The brain was built for patterns. It likes patterns. Similar patterns are easy. Things that do not seem to form a pattern are not so easy. Think of how we deal with day to day things. Music is a pattern of sounds. Things we consider good music has rhythm and beat, and musical progression.. all of which are patterns. Patterns we understand. Sounds that do not seem to have any set beat or rhythm are generally not considered musical, or perhaps fall into a fringe perception of music because they have patterns we do not understand. And learning to appreciate various types of music comes from learning to understand the inherent patterns.
So what does that all mean?
It means that the mind loves patterns.. Habits are patterns. So the mind loves habits. And this is the biggest reason why habits are difficult to change once they are set. This goes for good and bad habits.
So how does this pertain to Will?
Habits, in any of their forms can interfere with Will. The mind seeks to find the easiest route through the use of habits, and can sometimes pre-empt our conscious choices. How many times have you intended to make a stop along an oft traveled driving route (say, the route you take to work), during a time when you were not normally traveling to work, and in the course of your driving, you completely forgot to stop? This is habit vs Will in action.
The bulk of this battle isn't what to do with good or bad habits, but learning what our habits are. You can't change or improve what you don't even consciously know about. And even though we may consider things good habits, it's important to recognize that life changes, and the habits may require change as well. This is why it is important to be introspective of your actions. Learn your motivations. Understand what drives your life's habits and use that information not only to mold better habits, but just to continue to be willful about your choices. We are not truly living our Will if we run through life on autopilot. Even if the plane appears to be on a good course.
We must be mindful of our actions. Habits, when used for positive means, are good tools in doing our Will, but it is vital that we guide these habits with our Will and not expect them to live our Will for itself.
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